Five Poems by Sammi Hatcher

1.

food tastes like
ash in my mouth
water doesn’t wet my lips
nor quench my thirst
alcohol sends you running
looking for another
poor soul to burden
cigarettes burn you
exhaling you with each breath
you are my nemesis
my never ending torment
i find little sanctuaries from you
but i’m never free
you are a constant of my life
and im learning to
live with you
in vain.

2. 

There are days where the sun hits my face
And I thank the whole world that I’m still here.
Those days are harder and harder to come by now.
But every now and then, I feel the suns warm embrace
And I can’t help but smile.
The wind blows through the trees,
making the leaves laugh as they tickle each other.
Flowers dance and the water shimmers.
I see colors that shouldn’t exist.
There are no words to describe them,
they just are.

3.

You are a virus
Infecting my heart
My head
My lungs
My stomach
My whole body
I want you gone
I want you to leave
And never come back
But that’s your fuel
You feed off my pain
You are drowning me
Like a tide come in too fast
You are a forest fire
Engulfing my everything
Burning me from the inside out
How do I extinguish the flame
If you’re water resistant
How do I stop the tide
You move too fast
Too wild
Sadly,
There is no cure
You turn my friends
My family
My loved ones
Into all the demons
I never wanted to face
How am I to get better
If I have no support
But you don’t care
You want to devour me
Eat away until I’m nothing
Nothing but a shell
An empty corpse
Getting me alone
Speeds that process for you
Makes my flesh tastier
More tender
There isn’t any help
I can’t find it
It doesn’t exist
How am I supposed to survive?

4. 

There is no light in this house
It resides in the darkness
Consuming the fleshy walls
Making playthings
Of the souls passing through
Contorting every memory
Into a nightmare
There is no calming it
Always doing as it pleases
It sleep for days
I quake in fear
Waiting for the slumber to end
When it wakes
Hungrier than ever
Ripping at my skin
I become the meal ticket I so despise
There is no pleasing it
It always wants more

The Darkness that Watches and Waits

i
am not the
self-proclaimed wallflower
i thought i was

i am a storm
a monster that comes in the night
and steals away your happiness
i am the darkness that watches and waits
for an opportunity to strike
when your defenses are down
and you have no
ammunition to protect yourself
and slowly
sadly

i have come to realize
i will always be this chaotic.
i will always destroy
no matter how good my intentions

there is an evil that lives inside
and she takes pleasure in the pain